Name: Adam Ar-Rashid
Class: LG2201A
Semester: 1
Title: My Sweet Lil' Blood Angel
Work Count: 372
Category: Poem
Brief Summary: A Break Up Poem
Other Details:
I never truly loved you
For God's sake I know it is true
Maybe I’m really blind or stupid, but it’s the right thing to do
Who cares, I just wanna be with you
My interests in you, it’s never cruel
Before I go to dreamland, I will always say “I love you”
Is my feeling to you love, I always wonder?
If it’s worth I’ll be willing to trade my soul to the soul trader
I love you so much, whenever I'm high or sober
Simple curiosity cross my mind if we’re soul mates
If it’s true, wow! It will be great
What if it’s not, my God hope it’ll not come true what I just said
Recently speaking I don’t really know what I feel right now
So many things in my mind, sorry I’m not willing to take a bow
I love you so much before, but I’m not really sure right now
We never fight at all, no such things as sorrow
We never share things, no offer for a borrow
I’m not sure our relation is love, today maybe what about tomorrow?
I really love you my sweet lil’ blood angel
It’s not I’ve someone else, but my heart right now, really fragile
I’m so sorry babe, my cute shorty, my sweet dream goodnight, my girl
So many things up in my head, my mind's been twisted and twirled
Maybe it’s good for us to keep the distance not just for now but for real
I’m sorry babe, maybe we are not meant to be
Maybe someone out here for you, or maybe I’m just being silly
I want us to be like before, when I say “I love you” daily
I just don’t want to know why but that's really rare lately
Maybe, maybe, maybe we should break up, really
I know this will break your heart, it hurts me too, I’m really really sorry
My sweet lil’ blood angel, I release you
Fly and go to the place you really want to
I insist I really do
Fly high and rip the sky in blue
Don’t worry about me, fate and faith will find me my real boo
It's just that, that boo it’s not you….
EDITED BY: Maisarah binti Ahmad Kamil
2 comments:
A nice poem overall, with great emotions from the persona as he speaks to us. The starting just shows us that the persona is confused, and at first, I was as well. He said he never truly loved her, but actually, he did, didn't he? At least that was the emotions that I could read. ;)
In terms of the beat, it's like reading through lyrics rather than a poem. It's moving, and the rhyming works really well in setting the pace. There's just so much emotions and confusion, you just don't know what's going on with the persona. Does he love her or doesn't he? But then again, the human heart is hard to understand, and that is plainly shown here.
I especially love the last stanza, when he finally lets her go. That stanza lacks real emotion - we don't know if he's being sarcastic, or sincere, or if he's just indifferent and doesn't want to think anymore. Overall great, keep it up! :D
thanks. i actually recite this poem for my language appreciation class. its true. i wasnt thinking straight when i wrote this poem, well emotionally overwhelmed actually. and as for the last stanza, i was being sincere. thanks...
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